"And of the children of Issachar, which were men that had understanding of the times, to know what Israel ought to do; the heads of them were two hundred; and all their brethren were at their commandment." ~ ! Chronicles 12:32
I used to have a man who mentored me spiritually. I had asked him to because I thought he would be a good fit for me.
Unfortunately, he was (and probably still is) part of the camp whose typical advice can be clichéd into "just pray and read your Bible."
In a sense, I get where that line of thinking comes from. It is, after all, the Spirit that dwells within us that guides us into all truth (1 John 1:27).
But God, in his incredible humility, also allows us to need each other:
"God" is actually a Trinity of persons and thus a circle of relationship (1 John 5:7)
God brings all the animals before Adam and, lacking true companionship, makes him a wife, Eve (Genesis 2:18-22)
Most of the Ten Commandments (6/10) deal with horizontal (human) relationships (Exodus 20:1-17)
We are called to love one another (Mark 12:31)
Although we could get everything from God, He allows us to be fed from others.
This is where my mentor comes back in.
He strongly emphasized, on several occasions, how useless modern psychology is to the spiritual life. And rightly so (1 Corinthians 2:14).
But my profession is that of a teacher. There are restrictions on how I am allowed to share my faith when interacting with students.
And so I must avail myself of the best psychological science available when attempting to help them with their struggles (in addition to praying for them).
* title of the blog from The Big Lebowski re: breaking the rules
I live in the city and commute about 45-50 minutes to work every day. I spend a lot of time on the interstate, most of it in the right lane doing the speed limit and minding my own business.
Every now and then someone will come up behind me and drive on my bumper for no reason whatsoever other than they apparently don't have the situational awareness to go around someone driving slower than them. It's really annoying.
What I also find annoying is people who cut over in front of me when it's not necessary. Like, stay in your lane, bro! (Ladies to this too, I'm sure.)
I found myself thinking that it's unfortunate that being rude, being an a--h---, is not against the law. I would much prefer for everyone to treat each other with civility. When I'm at my best self, I'm very gracious and am able to live this out pretty well (I'm not perfect by any means).
I came across 2 identical situations in the last week that also exemplify rudeness:
Many of my eighth graders are reading a novel in English class. As one of them was leaving class the other day, he turned to his classmates and said, "____ and _____ die." (He hasn't been reading the novel with them in class, he looked up a summary on the internet.)
My friend's ex-husband -- whom she has to interact with because of visitation rights & child support for their kids -- texted her Thursday after the premier of Avengers: Infinity War and spoiled the ending.
"There is no curse in Elvish, Entish, or the tongues of Men for this treachery."
Like, there is no punishment for the level of jerk one has to be to betray their fellow man in that regard. Nothing that I can come up with, anyway, apart from a serious beating.
While lamenting about this, I realized something: being rude to each other is against the Law.
And one of the scribes came, and having heard them reasoning together, and perceiving that he had answered them well, asked him, Which is the first commandment of all?
And one of the scribes came, and having heard them reasoning together, and perceiving that he had answered them well, asked him, "Which is the first commandment of all?"
And Jesus answered him, "The first of all the commandments is: 'Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord: and you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.' This is the first commandment.
"And the second is like it, namely this: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.' There is none other commandment greater than these." ~ Mark 12:28-31
It does bring some comfort to know that there is, in the end, accountability for all the unloving things a person has done.
But What About the Sacred Romance?
Anyone who's spent time with me discussing religion is likely aware that I'm a fan of a view of Christianity known as the Sacred Romance. It is a poetic/romantic look at the world and seems to be a version of Christianity that is, as for Dorothy, as colorful as Oz is to Kansas.
I don't subscribe the term and concept of God fearing. That's a dated mentality that was used to control people. We are in the future. If God is love and love it's the opposite of fear then... to fear God makes no sense
I understand what the phrase means, but dang if this ain't a whole other perspective on the phrase "God-fearing." Makes me appreciate the romantic & poetic nature of the Sacred Romance. Be define by love, not by fear.
We also mustn't discount the place of fear in bringing people to God, for "it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment" and "it is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God" (Heb 9:27 & 10:31).
God loves us enough to have offered us forgiveness through Jesus' sacrifice, and He loves others enough to punish those who wrong them (Matthew 25:31-46).
Because let's face it, a man isn't worth anything if he can't produce income, make something of himself (is this why Paul so that he who doesn't work is worse than a nonbeliever? 1 Timothy 5:8). We love the concept of a self-made man in America but everyone is a product of the company they keep.
So could it be that, when we are sick and physically weak – when
we are finally allowed to be vulnerable – that the floodgates burst and
we become almost incapacitated (according to the stereotype)?
Here’s my question: How sick do I have to be to feel okay
about taking a day off? How weak do I need to be to confess, “I can’t come to
work today”?
My head throbs with no
movement and aches even worse with any movement whatsoever (for which taking
headache meds).
My nose runs so bad that it
drips with little-to-no warning (taking pseudo-fed, using a vapor rub, and a
Vick’s “inhaler” laced with menthol).
My throat is so scratchy
that I make every attempt possible to minimize talking in order to avoid
coughing (so much so that it makes me want to throw back cough drops like nobody’s
business).
This is not me complaining; for the most part, I’m a pretty
healthy person and I can deal with some things that others can’t and don’t
suffer from some things that others do.
(This is not me bragging; I’m simply listing the facts of my
health at the moment.)
But I also am not used to being vulnerable enough to allow
interdependence – to allow someone else to take care of me, to meet a need that
I can’t take care of on my own.
In the wounds we take while growing up (see link for “not to
our friends” above), we learn to become very guarded. We don’t open up because
we don’t want to become (even more) hurt (than we already are).
For men, taking care of everyone else with no one to take
care of us takes quite a toll on our hearts, our mental toughness. Always
trudging on because of discipline and not from a core of genuine strength
leaves us playing the part without feeling like we can.
“I’ve been dressing up as something
I’m not for so long; I’m so afraid you won’t like what’s underneath. But here I
am: I’m just flesh and blood. And weakness.”
So let’s stop shaming people for expressing weakness.
Let’s allow people to open up and be vulnerable to
receive the relational food – the love – that we all need.
Let’s find ways to empower others to be as
self-sufficient as possible.
And let’s look out for one another’s good enough where we
can become interdependent and actually need each other.
Tensions and tempers are particularly high around the issue
of removing statues that represent part of our history. The opportunity to
pause and reflect on exactly what my relationship to culture as a Christian should
be is staring me in the face, and I’ve given it some thought.
One of the great things about the kingdom of God is its
ability to transcend culture and government. As a Church, we can wage spiritual
war in any culture and under any government.
Which implies that we also shouldn’t be too attached to our
culture or government.
I was, initially, against the removal of statues of
Confederate generals; after all, it’s part of our history. Besides, I’m not a
fan of changing something just because someone is offended by it.
Enter Scott Adams.
The reason for my fascination with him is because
he provides an alternative viewpoint that I don’t find anywhere else. I don’t
agree with everything he says, but he is a uniquely smart and insightful man
that provides fairly consistent commentary on current events.
Dealing with this from a persuasion perspective (his niche perspective), he stated that America’s “brand” is basically “freedom and
opportunity.” We pro-freedom (anti-slavery) and pro-capitalism (anti-communism).
But there are people who see these statues and, because of their life
experiences, interpret them as continued evidence that America is racist.
(I don’t believe America is racist. There's a lot of thought behind this belief, but for the purpose of
the blog, I’ll leave it at that.)
The true America is a set of ideas about freedom and
opportunity. It is not the dirt that we live on nor is it encompassed in the objects that adorn it.
If removing the statues helps someone who has been impacted
by cultural differences or had personal experience encounters with racism view America as less racist, then I’m on board:
“So if what I eat causes another believer to sin, I will
never eat meat again as long as I live--for I don't want to cause another
believer to stumble.” (1 Corinthians 8:13)
History is not being re-written (that’s still in the books), so calm down, Chicken Little.
A great way to go about this would be to auction them off to
private citizens/organizations (hat tip to NattyZ).
All that being said, I feel that Mayor Stoney’s idea to provide context to the statues on Monument Ave is a great compromise between changing
nothing and changing everything.
"Writing is not hard. Sitting down to write is hard."
It's not that pursuing our creative outlets is difficult. In fact, once we get going, the creativity just sort of "takes over" and momentum can build very quickly (e.g., last week I filled up the back of a church bulletin with notes for an upcoming blog).
No, once the snowball starts rolling, it's pretty hard to stop it.
It took a second class period sitting in the room to hear
the stealthy ticking of the clock. (Perhaps it was because first period doesn’t
test very well -- some of them seem skittish about silence.)
But during second period, for the first time pretty much all
year, I noticed its steady, rhythmic breathing (perhaps that’s redundant).
It wasn’t until fourth period that it became incessant --
perceptually salient now that it has entered my awareness, a “face” from which I
am unable to turn (for it enters my ears at all angles).
It “watches” over me like a silent sentinel, its hands “pointing”
the ways to go for the students (if only they were paying attention to it).
I wonder if that sound will ever truly get out of my head,
now that I have become aware of it -- similar to how an idea never truly leaves
you, once your mind has processed it...
“The mind, once stretched by a new idea, never returns to
its original dimensions.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
* In an effort to encourage my writing, I will be adding shorter posts from time to time. This is one of them.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver recently did an episode on televangelists:
I'm certainly not denying scriptures like Luke 6:38, but those
scriptures can be abused when taken out of context of the larger gospel. When
you give only to get you will not reap -- that's greed, AKA the love of
money (which is the root of all evil, 1 Timothy 6:10).
This is what I love about the Sacred Romance -- your *heart*
in the matter makes the difference, not just what you *do* (Matthew 6:1-2,5,
15:8).
Money is one of the places where Christianity shines, I think. The world says, "Chase money. Money is your security." God says, "Chase Me; I'm your security." The point, I think, is not to be obsessed about money. I don't really think about money that much. I think about being productive, being fruitful, being a man, working hard -- and trusting God to take care of us. I think this is what Jesus meant when he said, "Don't worry about money. Focus on God and His way of doing things, and He will take care of you." (Matthew 6:19-20, 24-34) How we look at that -- what we believe about that -- changes everything. ~ John Eldredge
Although I don't believe that God *wants* people to be poor ("you can't *help* the poor if you *are* the poor"), saying God wants you to be rich isn't exactly right, either
The difference?
Followers of God focus on others; the rich focus on
themselves (by buying “parsonages” for $6,500,000).
I've had the same Verizon Wireless monthly plan for over 4 years:
450 minutes
unlimited text
2 GB of data
I use autopayment, so there's no real need to look at my bill.
And I never really use all of it, so there was no reason to change.
Until I accidentally downloaded 1.5 GB's of music with the Amazon Music app (their user interface is awful!).
In a panic, I called Verizon to see what my options were.
I could pay $10/GB over, or I could change to a 3 GB plan that would cover my data-download anomaly.
I anxiously changed plans with the hope that my old plan would be there when the billing cycle was over.
And yes, the old plan was there.
But my heart sank when I realized that the grandfathered $20/month discount was gone.
I 've spent a couple years wondering why people left Verizon for carriers with lower bills; I consistently paid under $70, so I wasn't really complaining.
However, for the duration of my 2-year plan, losing the irrecoverable $20/month discount will cost me $340.
All because I made a hasty, rash decision without being familiar with my bill and the details therein.
Conclusion:
Read the fine print.
Go over your bills every month, even if it's just to maintain (2 Peter 1:12) knowledge of what the charges and credits are.
And verify the consequences of your financial choices before you make them.
But this isn't the only hasty decision I've made that will cost me a couple hundred dollars:
An incident recently occurred whereby I could've saved over $800.
However, in the midst of the moment, I was so overcome with shame -- I thought the incident was my fault -- that I didn't do anything about it.
DEAR ABBY: My question is very simple, Abby. Who determines right or wrong in your life, your opinions, your column? This will tell me all I need to know about your wisdom or advice. -- RON IN MICHIGAN
DEAR RON: Actually, I think your question is anything but "simple," and the answer is: I do.
Let me first say that I can empathize with the sentiment expressed by Ron: you want to know the information you're getting is legit, especially when you're dealing with morality. Even in our post-modern, relativistic society, I think we can all agree that not all moralities are equal: Adolf Hitler's morality will never be equal to Mahatma Gandhi's morality.
I deliberately chose 2 non-Christians to prove a point.
As a follower of Jesus, there are certain things that I readily acknowledge, among them being the existence of moral absolutes:
There are things in this world that are simply wrong. The reason we know that they're wrong is because of our conscience:
Even Gentiles, who do not have God’s written law, show that they know his law when they instinctively obey it, even without having heard it. They demonstrate that God’s law is written in their hearts, for their own conscience and thoughts either accuse them or tell them they are doing right. ~ Romans 2:14-15
However, our conscience can become "seared" or numbed to right and wrong:
Now the Holy Spirit tells us clearly that in the last times some will turn away from the true faith; they will follow deceptive spirits and teachings that come from demons. These people are hypocrites and liars, and their consciences are dead (read: seared). ~ 1 Timothy 4:1-2
Those verses are referring to those within Christianity, but those outside the church can have the same "searing" of their consciences that will fail to convict them of right and wrong.
So back to "Ron."
I understand that he wants to make sure that what he's reading is morally sound.
I really do.
However, having read Dear Abby for over a decade, I can say that, although the advice she offers is not always biblically sound, she has a lot of knowledge about etiquette and manners to offer. (This can be especially important if you're in a situation that calls for a particular set of cultural customs to be followed.) There have been occasions where Abby has offered advice that I don't agree with, sure. I'm grateful for realizing those times because it reminds me of what I believe (because I look to her for advice, not truth). However, there have been times where she has mentioned something that I wouldn't have thought of that has changed my way of thinking.
"Eat the meat and throw away the bones," as the saying goes.
I'm not saying you should deliberately eat "bones." Not by a long shot.
But I also know that interacting with people that have different beliefs that I do can strengthen my beliefs because I remind myself of what is absolutely true. It forces me to think about what I believe and why.
As to Ron's attitude, I've seen it before in those in my life, as well as in myself.
As I've previously written, I've allowed God to open up my mind to teach me from those I would've otherwise dismissed.
But I've heard others mention that there are entire groups of people that they refuse to open up to because they don't want to "taint" their beliefs. This has the effect as coming across as arrogant and prideful, and communicates the attitude, "Those people have nothing to teach me."
At its best, it's a refusal to listen to people's experience; at its worst, it's a refusal to open up fully to God and allow him to lead you wherever, whenever, to whomever.
And I know for a fact that some of those authors who have opened my eyes to new ways of looking at the world -- even non-Christians -- would have a profound effect on how these other people perceive their life if they would but open their eyes and ears.
But I also recognize that not everyone is called to everything. My favorite author, John Eldredge, apparently enjoys reading Dallas Willard (Eldredge has referenced several of Willard's books). Personally, I can't stand reading Willard because I find him to be too dry. That is, however, my personal opinion and something I had discover through personal experience; if you enjoy reading him, then go for it.
However, too often people avoid/dismiss others based on prejudice and stereotypes, not on personal experience (or, much less, following the Holy Spirit).
All this to say that you must take care when espousing viewpoints of absolutism. I mean, you don't want to come across as a Sith lord:
This doesn't mean that we shouldn't believe in absolute truth, because truth is absolutely necessary to keep your bearings in a world so adrift when it comes to morality and evil:
But humility and compassion are "absolute" musts; "the greatest of these is love," as Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 13:13. Without following the greatest commandment to love God with every fiber of our being and to show his fervent love to ourselves and our neighbors, the followers of Christ will represent him as judging and austere (I'm pointing fingers at you, Westboro Baptist Church!).
Contrast that with this:
"Do you think that I like to see wicked people die?" says the Sovereign Lord. "Of course not! I want them to turn from their wicked ways and live." ~ Ezekiel 18:23
So all that to get to this:
If you're going to turn down something, manners matter! "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger" (Proverbs 15:1).
Learning to be a loving person is the loftiest goal anyone can aspire to:
To be unloving is to fail at the very thing we were created for. It is a rejection of the essence of our existence, a rejection of the Love that made us... I think you can fairly easily sort out the people who have come to this epiphany from those who have not. There is something different about their approach to life -- what upsets them, what makes them laugh, and especially the way they handle people. ~ Love & War, "Learning to Love"
There are some who would seek to dismiss love as an inefficient limitation, as if a bird had chosen to remind grounded and give up their aeronautical ways.
As The Shack notes,
"Love is not the limitation; love is the flying."
This does not mean that you can't tell others that they're wrong; Jesus walked perfectly in love and let the Pharisees have it, for sure -- but his ire was usually directed toward the overly-religious, not those outside the church or honestly seeking God.
Love can be fierce as well as tender. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you when each is needed (Luke 12:12).
Dedicate yourself to God, ask him to love you, and you will become a more loving person who will handle others with care.
There's simply too much brokenness in this world to not pursue love above all else.
